Spike Heels

The lazy days of winter term are over here at UD, and the town is now swelling once again with undergraduates, who have graciously returned to entertain those of us regular folks with their unbelievable fashion sense. The tights/Uggs ensemble is old news now; in with the new! On the way downtown last night, Superman and I got a good laugh from a girl running in leggings, very bright green shorts, a funky top, and a wild headband. It got better when I went to park the car on my way back from aerobics: A group of three girls, obviously headed out for the evening, walked by. In front of the pack was a young lady in a jacket, green skirt, leggings, and spike heels. Behind her were two girls who looked comfortable from head to ankle in jeans and regular top/jacket combos, but they were both wearing spike heels as well.

After cringing as I watched them struggle to cross the street gracefully, I had a sudden urge to open the window and yell, "Girls! No one is going to notice the shoes! Save your feet while you still can!"

I've tried this before, explaining to eighth grade girls whining about their heels that I have jogged across streets in San Francisco in four-inch-heeled platform boots and paid for it with plantar fascitis later (tough on a marathoning hobby). They just stared at me, not believing that there was any way I could ever have been remotely cool. It's true; giving advice wearing running shoes and jeans just doesn't inspire action.

Apparently, around the time I stopped being cool, I also became a hall monitor. Superman calls me the neighborhood busybody, and he's right. Once you teach, you become very comfortable with giving other people instructions for how to behave appropriately.

I'll try to contain myself. After all, I'm sure those undergrads could offer me a few fashion tips.